I used to wear low cut tops, extremely short skirts, and very provocative bathing suits. The reason I dressed this way was because I was so insecure. I had a need to get attention to feed my insecurity and the result of this was dressing in a manner to get that attention. The problem of my insecurity was never solved though by getting attention in this way. It actually created more insecurity as time went on because I became so focused on the way I looked and soon all of my value and self-worth lied in the way I looked and what people thought of me.... Others can see our heart by what we wear on the outside. If we are dressing provocatively, it is obvious our heart is longing to be praised and get attention. We then must ask ourselves: are we seeking God or seeking the world when we dress this way. We are seeking the world.
1 Peter 3:3-4 - "Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight." (NIV)
Do you dress modestly? Think about the things you wear and why you wear them... are they pleasing to God? The way we dress and act will set the example of how others will see us. We can dress in a way that shows Christ or we can dress in a way that promotes the worlds message... If you are dressing in a way that commands the attention of those around you, then they will not see Christ when they look at you, they will just focus on your outward appearance and not the light that radiates from the heart.
1 Peter 2:12 - "Be careful to live properly among your unbelieving neighbors. Then even if they accuse you of doing wrong, they will see your honorable behavior, and they will give honor to God when he judges the world." (NLT)
Discernment is so important when shopping for clothes. One way to discern if an outfit is modest is to ask yourself why you are buying it.
These are some things that are great to ask yourself when shopping:
- Is it something you like or is it designed to draw attention to yourself?
-Are you buying the outfit to attract the opposite sex?
-What type of attention are you seeking?
-Will this outfit take the attention away from God and put it on myself?
There isn't anything wrong with wanting to look nice... the problem comes when you put your desire to look good over your desire to please God.
Media, celebrities, and magazines promote that image is everything. I used to buy into that program. What I found was that it made me more insecure, more miserable, and I never felt good enough. I now know that image is an ILLUSION. The world promotes a quick fix for everything. If you aren't tan enough you can get a spray tan, if you have too many wrinkles try Botox, if you aren't thin enough take weight loss pills, if you have blemishes put on lots of makeup, if you want attention dress provocatively, if your teeth are too yellow get them bleached, if your eyelashes and hair aren't long enough get extensions..... All of these things though are just an illusion.... they are just a mask. The real problem lies within our hearts..
Here's what the Bible says about modesty and what God finds beautiful:
God doesn't focus on our outward appearance. It is what's on the inside that matters most to Him. The Bible tells us that God's focus is on developing the qualities of our hearts, so that it can be reflected in everything we do. Qualities like: love, kindness, integrity, honesty, humility, meekness...
1 Samuel 16:7 - "The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart." (NIV)
Once I realized, by God's grace, that I will never find confidence or happiness when I am focusing so much on my outward appearance and that it could only be found in working on my inner qualities and focusing on honoring God with my life I finally found true confidence. When I used to wear hair extensions all the time and had to have a spray tan on and clothes that got me attention, I was focused on the wrong things. It was consuming my heart and taking my eyes off of the Lord. I was so self consumed with posting pictures of myself on Facebook to try and get likes and for people to think that I looked good. I had to take a real close look at my priorities and cut some things out of my life.
Proverbs 31:30 - "Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting: but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised."(NIV)