What is getting in your way of growing in Christ?

One of the biggest things that stands in the way of whether or not you are growing in Christ or growing away from Christ.... Is you. 

I had never attended church until the age of 15 and that is when I became a believer in Christ. I got baptized at 16 and I was on fire for The Lord and attended church every Sunday. I was so passionate about learning more, growing in Him and becoming a better person... But a lot of things changed...

I believe the reason that so many people grow away from God after once proclaiming His name and and putting their faith in Him is because their idols get in the way. They become friends with the world and they become less concerned with how god views them and more concerned with how their peers view them. I believe people get too caught up in their goals and dreams and their lives that they lose sight of the prize. We get too wrapped up in ourselves...

This doesn't mean we are to live miserable lives. It means that we need to love Him more than life itself. We need to have his word as a guide over everything that we do and especially over our goals and decisions in  life. 

He needs to be number one. And this is where our idols get in the way. One of gods commandments is that we shall have no other gods before him. This can be just about anything. Whatever you love more than God is something you are making a God in your life. It is your idol.  So some people put a family member in place of God... A spouse, boyfriend, a friend, a pet. Or maybe a job... Or our own life goals. Facebook. Or even their college...

Whatever it may be. We are called to love God above and beyond any of these things. BC when he's not number one in our hearts we are off balance. And it is easier to fall into temptation and easier to give into sin, and those things do not lead to fruitfulness. He deserves our complete love because God demonstrated his own love for us in that While we were still sinners, Christ died for us!  

Most people think that I was not a Christian when I was modeling lingerie and working for VS and posing for men's magazines. Most think I got saved and then left the modeling industry... But like I said earlier I became a believer at 15... I began modeling at the age of 14 and I left home at 16 to pursue my dream of modeling full time in NYC. I was a Christian while I did all if those things that were definitely conflicting with scripture.. Things like drinking underage at the VS fashion show, posing topless at the age of 17... When I dressed provocatively and posed in men's magazines and purposely tried to get attention from men. When I posted tons of selfies on social media sites to try and get attention. When I flirted with other men while I was married... Yes I was a Christian during it all. But I had veered away from living my life for Christ...

I  was living my life for my own personal dreams... Not the dreams God had for my life. My own glory, not spreading Gods glory. I was selfish not selfless. I was living for my own idol, not for the one true God. I was living in a way that the world promoted. Not in the way that the bible called me to live. I was friends with the world... And I was on a path towards destruction, not a path of life.


Modeling was my God and it was hindering my relationship with Christ. It was blinding me from the light. When you love something so much, everything you do revolves around it. You will lie for it, compromise for it, change for it... I made a lot of compromises to get to the top in my career.... Weight loss.... Posing provocatively, changing the way I acted.  I was willing to do a lot of things to achieve my dream if becoming a VS model. And the more you compromise, the more you fall into destruction.... I made modeling and my career and my fame my life. 

I wasn't doing anything for Gods glory. It was all for my own glory. I only cared what people in the world thought of me. I wanted them to tell me I was beautiful and famous. I wanted to be liked...

Well I definitely wasn't showing people Christ by the way I lived my life... . I spent so much time trying to make it to the top because the world told me thats what i should do to be happy but once I was at the top I still found that I was searching for happiness and none of it was truly satisfying. 

So shortly after becoming a vs model I looked to God for answers. I thought that I was supposed to have a good job, lots of money,  and success and live a prosperous life as a Christian but when I gained all of those things I still had no fulfillment...

So God showed me that I was living for myself and living for my dreams rather than for Him and the life He had for me. 
I was not serving Him.... 

I was leading girls into eating disorders, men into temptation, causing destruction....
I was not being a good wife to my husband. 

I was not taking up my cross and following Him... My cross was on the floor hidden underneath pillows and blankets! 

I needed to begin to deny myself and my goals and my life and follow God and trust that His plans were better than mine!  

He promises fulfillment, and security. He promises restoration and unconditional love... He promises that He sees us as beautiful. All these things I was searching for could only be found in living for Him and putting Him first... So I needed to cut out the thing that was taking me away from Him.. My idol... My modeling career. It was the thing I kept sinning for and falling into temptation for. So I made the decision to give up modeling. And stop trying to get attention and fame. I gave it all up so that I could glorify Him and live my life for Him alone. And what I found was... 

All of his promises were true! I stand here today totally changed. I had left home with big plans for my life...plans that pulled me away from Him and he showed me that his plans far surpass mine! I've never been happier than I am when I am making God number one in my life... So I encourage you to examine your hearts.
Are your plans guided by scripture?Have you  trusted in God for your future? Everything is better when we trust In God.... Everything is better for our lives when He is number one, my prayer for you is that you will stay strong in His word and hav Him on your heart at all times so you do not get sucked into everything this crazy world entices you with because none of the worlds promises even compare to Gods. 

You can read more about my story in my book I'm No Angel 

Romans 12:1

Therefore I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship.

Matthew 19:21

Jesus said to him, "If you wish to be complete, go and sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow Me."


  1. Thank you for writing these articles. They are really truly a blessing. I just want you to know that just beacuse people don't comment doesn't mean they are not reading it. :)

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  3. Kylie, I wanted you to know God has used your story dramatically in my life. The only women who defended modesty in my life were women in my church who approached the subject harshly toward me. Naturally I rebelled, thinking it wouldn't really affect me, because God loves everyone right? I became obsessed with Victoria's Secret. I was obsessed with trying to look sexy. But somewhere in the back of my heart, there was still love for Jesus. When your story came out though, I felt so very convicted. I read your book last year and since then that I haven't been to a single Victoria's Secret ever since, my wardrobe has dramatically changed and I have rededicated my life to Jesus and made a decision at 24 to commit to purity and honoring my husband (even if I am not married yet) in being mindful about the choices I make and the clothes I wear. I also loved your story so much that a few friends and I now have a book club where we are reading a new chapter of it every week at Barnes & Noble at Rowan University. You remain such an encouragement to me and I thank God for the work He has done in you! The world needs more people like you who would give up fame and fortune to serve out His will for your life.

    Love, Ashley

    P.S. Irrelevant info, but I am the same girl who bought your tan colored leather jacket off of Poshmark haha :)

  4. I am writing this little article to thank Dr. Wakina (dr.wakinalovetemple@gmail.com) and my Boyfriend (Andrew) who made efforts to restore my confused spirit. My Ex vowed that he must fight with his last strength to see that I am sad and don’t last with my current Boyfriend after I broke-up with him because he didn’t have any positive idea about keeping a Girlfriend, he was so abusive and unromantic. So I decided to break-up and moved on with a guy who values me and gives me every satisfaction that I have wanted. This made my Ex so angry and went extra miles to use charms on me and gave me restless and confused spirit, I couldn’t concentrate anymore with Andrew and the feelings for him was gradually dying. I didn’t know how Andrew noticed that it’s a spiritual attack and consulted Powerful Doctor Wakina who used his spiritual eyes to look into my spirit and traced my case to my Ex. This Great Man called back my dying spirit because I was almost going crazy; he broke the charm on me, cast a reunion love spell and cleansed me before I came back to my senses. My Ex has confessed that Dr. Wakina sent fire to him and made him restless; he said that he couldn’t sleep at night because he was always hearing voices shouting that he should confess and destroy the charm.

    Story short; I am myself now and in love with my Boyfriend for two months now without issues and we have just discovered another taste of love because of Dr. Wakina strong power. Contact him today to get back your lover as Andrew did for me and set him/her free to realize who their true love is. His email is dr.wakinalovetemple@gmail.com

    Name: Elba Rene
    Country: USA

  5. Deana Raymond;

    I was never welcomed in my Husband’s Family, I was hated by all his siblings especially his Mom, she never want seeing me around her or attending the same occasion. My Husband changed and drove me out of the house just few weeks after he visited his Mom, His mother brainwashed him and took him to evil gathering where there deceived him to join them and abandon me because my spirit will never welcome their union and I might cause heavy harm to their gathering. He accepted their request because of his mother’s influence and decided to send me away, froze my account and restricted me from seeing our kids. I took this case to so many spiritual leaders but none can bring the solutions I needed. I went online after 4 wasted months to seek for any help. I was lucky to find testimonies and recommendations about Dr. Wakina and others, but I chose Dr. Wakina because the testimonies said about him looks legit and are related to my case.

    Story short; Doctor casted the peaceful love spell on me, my husband and his family to reunite us within 7days. He said that the spell will serve as a protection to us and we will live as a happy family for the first time. Well; I was afraid because I don’t know what will be the outcome but I kept my hope and faith strong and also prayed hard for this. His spell finally worked at the date he prophesied. My husband and his family including his Mom located me, kneeling and confessing for the evil done to us and the family even when we missed our baby. I cried and accepted their apology; I knew that there didn’t do it on purpose. We are all happy as a family today and we all called and thank Dr. Wakina for the total freedom he gave to us. I regretted why I wasted time contacting local spiritual doctors when my Husband left. Thank you Dr. Wakina for making me to testify like others and I will keep spreading this great news for ages. Here is Dr. Wakina’s Email: dr.wakinalovetemple@gmail.com

  6. Wow. This blessed me a lot, thanks for your testimony and for pouring your heart out! I was obsessed with the fashion world too back then, VS fashion shows included, and when I heard about you just letting an opportunity slip away - I got annoyed (honestly). I was like: Why was this girl just letting something big slip off her fingers - and I was actually a christian at that time.

    I've change a lot too and have seen (and is continually so) the beauty of God - how His promises is sooo incomparable with the seduction of the world. And now, I see you as someone who's very inspirational, you've gotten so high up in the Hollywood food chain and had many eyes on you (waiting to judge you wrongly) and yet you still followed God, wow - you are such an inspiration, thank you for that.

    Thank you again, I've related to your post a lot :)

    - Shania from bestofallwalks.blogspot.com

  7. There's a lot of truth here, Kylie. I've been thinking a lot the past few days since I first read this about what my own idol has been. There are lots of options to chose from, I'm afraid. But when I really break it all down, my idol has ultimately been people. As I think about it, almost every single thing I've ever done that has taken me in the opposite direction of God has been connected to my desire to be liked and accepted and to get attention and approval. I have spent so much of my life thus far trying to impress people, many of whom I don't even know or like! When I lay it all out like that, it just sounds completely ridiculous. And it was all grounded in a fear of being alone, I guess. It made me abjectly miserable too. I have since taken steps to start dealing with this. Anyway, thank you for opening up and sharing your thoughts, feelings and experiences. It's good to get people thinking and talking about this stuff. You are an amazing woman. God bless.

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